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The Queen’s favourite cheesemaker might lose its royal warrant

Upon learning that Dairy Crest Limited was recently fined £1.5 million for committing a series of environmental offences, it looks like Lizzie might strip the company’s right to display the coat of arms on its packaging.

Whether or not you’re a fan of the British monarchy, I’m sure we can all agree that Queen Elizabeth choosing to reprimand her favourite cheesemaker because it’s up to no gouda – pun very much intended – is a pretty baller move indeed.

According to the Guardian, Dairy Crest Limited (which is the UK’s top cheddar supplier and one of the largest manufacturing sites in Europe, churning out 57,000 tons of products annually) was recently fined £1.5 million for committing a series of environmental offences.

Namely treating Cornwall’s River Inny as its chemical dumpster over several years, repeatedly pumping it full of ‘liquid waste, suspended solids, and biochemical sludge’ that turned the water thick and black and killed hundreds of trout and salmon.

The finding came after numerous complaints from residents about the ‘horrendous eggy smells’ assaulting them since the dumping began in 2016, which have been so bad they’ve left locals ‘literally unable to leave their houses’ and plagued with insomnia as a result of odour-induced headaches and vision problems.

One of UK's biggest dairy firms fined £1.5m for polluting Cornwall river | Pollution | The Guardian

‘As a large and well-established operator, Dairy Crest Limited should be up to the job of maintaining the required environmental standards,’ says Helen Dobby, director of the organisation which brought the pollution breaches to light.

‘Instead, it has over a period of many years failed to comply with its environmental permit and not been able to protect local people and the environment.’

Unfortunately, despite Dairy Crest’s statement expressing its sincere apologies to those who’ve been affected by the reportedly hellish stench and the noxious seepage, it seems like its wrongdoings won’t be going unpunished.

Why? Because Lizzie’s threatened to strip the company of its royal warrant, meaning it’ll no longer have the right to its most special privilege: displaying the coat of arms on its packaging.

Crackler

These grants are given by the Queen and Prince Charles to their best-loved suppliers, indicating that what they produce is both enjoyed by the royal family and is of the utmost quality.

‘This move would probably be painful for the queen because Davidstow is understood to be her preferred cheddar,’ said a source at Buckingham Palace. ‘Still, it is non-negotiable that cheesemakers to the Queen must keep up with environmental standards.’

Yet although campaigners have welcomed the potential move, they are now calling for the Queen to review royal warrants from other meat and dairy producers.

They claim that intensive animal farming is making a ‘royal mess’ of England’s rivers and hope that Lizzie will decide to remove her insignia from all those responsible for this issue.

‘This case is emblematic of a national issue,’ says Rob Percival, head of food policy at the Soil Association.

‘Only 16% of inland freshwater bodies in England are close to their natural state, and intensive livestock operations, which provide much of our meat and dairy, are partly to blame.’

‘These systems tend to create far more manure and slurry than can be safely recycled back to the soil, and inadequate slurry storage, coupled with the over-application of nutrients, often results in river pollution, harming fish and aquatic life.’

Yes, I too am in dis-brie-lief at the absurdity of the situation, but at the end of the day, a win for the planet is a win for all of us. I’m glad that Lizzie at least has our backs on this one – it would have grated on me otherwise.

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