Are dating apps creating a spark designed to go out?

Romantic economics

The majority of dating apps are based on a ‘freemium’ model. This means that the more people using apps’ free features, the more likely that larger quantities of the apps’ members will be enticed to pay for the premium features as well.

Ironically, not only are the people receiving fewer matches on dating apps the ones likely to invest more in the additional paid features – see sunk cost fallacy –  but this model also translates almost exactly into the way that users are exposed to and interact with each other as well.

The teleological therefore is revealed to be tautological, and the swiping continues.

Really, it’s a wonder that this marketing tactic works at all. Especially considering the freely available statistics which suggest that people who meet on dating apps (as opposed to other forms of romantic connection) are less-likely to stay together long term.

Although I reckon that the clever incorporation of testimonials into the apps’ advertisements – unfortunately, the exception rather than the rule – does much of the heavy lifting.

I reckon too, that at least part of the reason why so many of these relationships that begin online are deemed less stable (according to the Computers in Human Behaviour journal), is due to a point that Thred’s Jessica Byrne makes:

‘With apps like Hinge, you arrive on a date knowing that the person finds you at least physically attractive’. Therefore, ‘the excitement and mysteriousness of…not knowing what they’re thinking, or whether they’re interested too – is quashed during one good date.’

Perhaps it is this very serving up of people – both of whom already know they find the other at least attractive ‘enough’ – on a platter, that is probably a large part of the reason why the romantic relationships that do develop aren’t lasting in the long-run.

If you didn’t even have to win your date over in the beginning, why would you be continuing to try and do so several months, or even years, down the line?

As Ob/Gyn physician and author Dr Jen Gunter tells Annie MacManus: desire ‘has to be cultivated.’ It’s not enough to expect the initial spark to stay lit if you’re seriously looking for something long-term.

Nevertheless, if there’s one thing that dating app designers have hit on, it’s this: while specific dating trends may come and go – as we’ve seen with the generational fluctuations from hook-up culture to long-term lovers – where there are people, there will always be the potential for a spark.

The thing that fewer dating apps like Tinder and Grindr seem to be honest about, however, is that sometimes, not only is a spark all there is, it’s all that we’re looking for as well.

Again as Jessica Byrne writes: ‘If you have a mutually fulfilling date, does it mean the two of you are romantically suited?… Enjoying someone’s company and liking them enough to pursue a potential future together are two entirely different things.’

And unfortunately, whilst dating apps like Hinge build campaigns around the latter, the reality is that apps like this are making their profits out of the former – at users’ expense. And that’s not even to begin calculating the expenses associated with an active dating life.

If you’re looking for the kind of love that makes it into the love songs, about falling in love gradually, or having been in love with someone for ages, that, ‘it’s always been you’ kind of love, dating apps probably aren’t the one.